Raven is so quiet, contemplating what I say and something in her face tells me she doesn't think I did the wrong thing by killing him. I wish I could explain it. It's like I WANT to feel bad for what I did and I want someone to scold me for it, make me feel low for doing such an act of cruelty. Killing someone is not me, it's not what I do, no matter the reason. Sure, he might have killed me but what makes me better than him? How is it any better for me to do as he would do? Doesn't that make me just as scum worthy as him? It's nice to see the concern in Raven's eyes though. I feel safe, something I haven't felt for a long time. There was a time when I felt so alone after coming here. Raven was gone a lot, mostly with Tobias and though I want her happy more than anything, I craved her presence like air in my lungs and I knew I could never ask her to be with me more when she has a pack. She has responsibility.

Plus I knew just asking for it would open up the conversation I dread and she would request once again for me to join her pack so we can be together more often. The noise of hooves on concrete pulls my thoughts from such things though and a mixture of anger and fear mix in my system, oozing out of my pores like acid as I see the dreaded creature approaching. Why must he torment me so? Was it not enough to make me kill someone then have the gall to touch his lips to mine? Raven draws her lips back and my own hackles rise instinctively but more than anything, I have that rising feeling of dread and a whine curls in my throat. Raven should go before things get bad. I'd hate for something to happen to her because of me. Secretly I wonder where Raven's pack is. This is supposed to be their territory right? If someone were to show up, of course I'd want to leave so they don't threaten me for being here but they'd also force HIM away, right? Raven only seems to grwo angrier beside me, her very body shaking with rage by the time he gets closer. And yet the feeling in my gut keeps rising.

Raven places herself between us and I only fear for her more. My tail tucks and my ears flatten, my eyes pleading with her. And yet she only has eyes for him. She threatens him, telling him he has no place here and I know she's only feeding his fire. Does she not remember what happened last time they had an encounter, the ice in her veins he put there? I couldn't bare it to see that again, her so helpless. I try to plead with her openly but there's only confusion in her eyes. I wish I could explain but I fear even then she would refuse to leave as she's doing now. She nips at my ear and I know the gesture is supposed to be reassuring but I only feel my fear building. "Not for getting each other hurt..." I all but whisper but I know she can hear me. She grins and I want to feed off of her confidence but I taste bile in my throat as he looks between us. Then she picks him up with her powers, tossing his large body into the wall of the alley way. I hear the smack like a cold fish on the ground and while a part of me rejoices to see pain flicker in his gaze, I only fear it will just make him hurt her all the worse.

She taunts him now and he turns his cold eyes on me and I shudder. Oh no. He only seems to draw amjusement from the interactions between Raven and I but I can feel the disgust he feels for Raven, as if she were nothing more than a bug to be squashed beneath his hoof. A deeper part of me does wonder how he can follow me as if I'm worth something and yet look at her with such detestation. I challenge him just as she does but I'm far less noble about it. He can taste my fear on his tongue so why would he want me in his pack over her? Surely with her powers, she would be the ultimate weapon, not me. But I push such thoughts away because it doesn't matter how he feels, I will NEVER join him. That would be my worst decision ever. He only seems pleased when I tell Raven to go, as if he thinks I'm doing it because he WANTS me to, not because I fear for what he would do to her. His worse to me have that alpha's appeal, the one that Claire ultimately gave into and while I'd like to see her again, to know how she's doing, I could never bring myself to ask him. That would entertain him too much, I'm sure.

I feel his words like a ripple under my skin, acid being poured on me. Fair? He thinks he's been fair to me? How is torturing a hunter in front of me and then threatening to torture him to death unless I kill him fair? He taunts me now, asking if I thought he was lying and my jaw tightens in dismay as I glance at Raven, wishing more than ever that she would heed my words and disappear. "Raven, please leave. He'll hurt you." I plea with her again. His words cut through me like ice, warning me that whatever's about to happen is because of my decision to oppose him. My legs tremble and I wish I cold say something back but I can't find my voice, my eyes already showing dread for what's to come. He turns to Raven, challenging her alpha, wherever he may be. I think of the green eyed man and my shoulders hunch. Somehow I don't think he's the kind you want to challenge and yet here Frost is openly challenging him. He warns her again, saying he'll use her to get his attention. Another whimper builds in my throat. My eyes find his as he speaks to me again, using Raven as a pawn this time, taunting me about bing a good friend for getting her killed and I find some strength and my voice now, stepping forward. "No, please!" I cry out to him, pleading with him now not to hurt her. He can see it in my eyes. I hate myself for such a thing but maybe I can reach some part of him that knows mercy, just maybe.

Then Raven acts, throwing him against the wall and his tail flicks, his anger clearly shown as he speaks in an unknown language that makes me quale. He rears up, literally jumping with his hind legs and while I watch, seemingly entranced by the graceful motions of such an animal, I also feel the building storm and know he's about to retaliate. He charges forward and I watch the muscles ripple beneath his smooth coat. He really is a sight to behold, a beautiful stallion, but so terrifying in his power. I feel myself side stepping, wanting to be out of the way but Raven holds steady and I hiss a warning between my teeth. Sh reacts as any fighter would though, rushing forward toward the stallion instead of away and I part my lips to gasp in fright. "Raven, no!" I cry out, somehow hoping she would hear and change her actions but nothing is stopping the stubborn wolf as she launches herself at Frost. His hooves come up and then slowly, agonizingly, they come down straight at her. A part of me wants to tear my eyes away and not see but I keep them on her anyway, a sound like a pitiful howl leaking from my lips as she falls and he pounds right over her, mercifully not crushing her further beneath his hooves as he goes past. A wild hope rises in me that he'll just keep going and leave now, my legs aching to go to her but as if he can hear my thoughts, he suddenly swings around on his back legs, another terrifyingly graceful maneuver, and turns back toward her.

This time he snakes his neck down toward her, his own grazing teeth shown to grab at her scruff and pick her up. I gasp again, my heart hamering as he swings her body like a ragdoll, tossing her carelessly into the wall of the alleyway just as she had done to him not too long ago. I yelp as I hear the audible smack of her body, as if I can feel her pain. A part of me wishes I could, if only to take it from her. This is because of me, this is all my fault. That's what he said and in this moment, I feel lower than dirt. What kind of friend am I? He taunts her from above, as if challenging her to get up and I close my eyes momentarily, actually praying that she's unconscious so that she can't hear him because something tells me if she is, she'll only want to do the opposite of what he says just to show him up. I fear that would be the worst thing she can do. As he puts his back to her, he now faces me adn I feel terribly and utterly alone, my eyes tearing away from the stoic figure of my best friend to look at him in panic and yet that utter loathing that only he seems to draw out of me burns like a wildfire in my eyes. He has the gall to smirk at me now as if what he'd just done was nothing to him and yet something tells me he's done far worse to others. My ears pin to my skull again at the thought. Again he asks for me to join him and I my jaw tightens. I glance over his shoulder at Raven, wishing I could get to her. Maybe then, I could heal her, do something anyway.

When my eyes meet his, I know what I must do. I close my eyes, linking my mind to Raven's, if only for a few seconds. It's harder because we're not pack but we are bonded so if I concentrate, I can still do it. The thoughts roll off my mind's tongue to hers, hoping she's alive enough to hear me. 'I will find you and heal you. I'm so sorry. Please don't hate me.' And then I open my eyes, my gaze burning into his as I step toward him, my tail coming up though my hackles remain raised, my ears remaining flattened as I face him. The words fall from my lips like defeat and yet my eyes continue to burn like fire. "Let's go." I say it with more confidence than I feel but it's the closest thing he's going to get from me as an answer. I'll leave with him, go where he takes me. At least that way, I can get him away from Raven. I try to throw out my mind's voice as I wait for his answer, trying to feel for Tobias. I'm not as close to him as I am to Raven but if he's in the vicinity of this place, maybe he'll still hear my silent plea for Raven. I try to put urgency into it, to let him know she needs him now. I just hope he arrives after we leave cause I'd hate to be responsible for his pain too.

alexis wilde