you could rattle the stars.
you could do anything,
if only you dared

The caffeine she so desperately needed this morning had been interrupted but a man who clearly had a death wish. Why she allowed him to follow her for as long as he did was beyond her. The lingering stench of alcohol still surrounds her, the hangover she desperately wished to go away still coursing through her veins and causing a pounding in her head. She had still managed to get a coffee and the caffeine didn't help, no, it never did, it simply made her more awake and more aware something she didn't care to ever be if possible. It was, perhaps, why she ended up at the ridiculously large mansion Dorian and Sebastian lived in... the guilt of her disappearance on the couple riding her a little too hard today. Dorian had been one of her first... friends after she arrived in Sacrosanct with Ivan, shortly meeting him after Sam and he had given her lessons on how to control her power for gods sake! He was a saint, and though he wasn't aware of her... situation, he still managed to be there when she needed him.

Ugh, she hated being sober. All these emotions rose up and were far more difficult to handle when she didn't have alcohol actively coursing through her system.

Dragging a scarred hand down her face, she rubs at her temples briefly before she deposits the empty coffee cup in a nearby trash before she begins assessing the security surrounding the mansion. Well, at the very least, Dorian and Sebastian knew how to live like kings. Literally. It was the middle of the day, it should be challenging to sneak into a royal's home and yet, she takes twenty minutes, casually watching the rounds before she makes her move, the assassin silently slipping up and over the wall. It wasn't the first time she had broken into the mansion, but the last time it was dark, much easier. Still, it was hardly challenging as she waits for the next round before she's darting across the open area silently, only to reach the gardens. There was some semblance of cover within the confines of the plants, though she doesn't linger very long in one spot. Instead, she paces casually, her black leather jacket, still tattered on one arm from her evening of drunkenness, a black stain against the vibrant hues of the plants.

That's what she was... a black stain in this world.

Oh god, why did she even come to see him? There was no possible way Dorian would want to see her! Dragging her fingers through her stark white hair, she finds a bench and sits down, her head falling forward to catch her face. She was an idiot, she shouldn't have come, she was better off drunk in her apartment where she couldn't hurt anyone... at least until Ivan willed it. Shaking her head, she finally lifts her icy blue gaze to the garden as she comes to a decision. Vhalla would wait here for five minutes and if Dorian wasn't around or if she wasn't caught she would leave. It wasn't the best decision she had made... no, the proper thing would have been to arrive at the gate like a normal person and ask to see him, but that seemed like too much commitment for Vhalla or perhaps it was the fact that she was certain he wouldn't want to see her. Her stomach rolls with anxiety, all those suppressed emotions coming to the surface, threatening to spill over at any moment's notice.

Grunting, she releases a sigh. She would follow through with this. Five minutes, that was it. Tilting her head back, she watches the clouds float lazily above her, it would almost be peaceful if her head wasn't pounding and she hadn't just broken into the royal residence for a second time.

Vhalla Solarn

To the stars who listen- and the dreams that are answered