These past few months have been absolutely difficult. Although Tobias took control upon the pack and the Ark he was merely a puppet, a puppet that had a severe attitude problem. While he continued to be a presence upon the throne, keeping an eye on their employees and their patrons that frequently visited the Ark, Raven was working with Jackal on making sure this ship stayed afloat, literally and figuratively. Not to mention she had to work through her own grief, hardly wishing to believe that he was truly dead. However, the girl gave up her faith a long time ago. No longer did she believe in miracles or wishing upon a star. As far as she was concerned there was no God. Tetradore was dead. It wasn't fair, and it was difficult to accept, but facts were the facts. It pained her every single time Tobias looked at her with dark eyes full of unwavering hope, his stuttering words held an optimistic tone, as he proclaimed morning, noon and night â€" Tetradore was coming back. In the beginning she had softly muttered that he wasn't, and it pained her each time she tried to explain to him that when you die...you die. Life was not like a video game where you could respawn at a moment's notice. Each time she told him the truth her heart ached as she realized she was slowly tearing down whatever shard of faith that was left in the broken boy. She decided after a month had past that she would no longer doubt him, but she wouldn't feed him false hope either...so her response was always with a silent pained smile.

Tetradore was the embodiment of a true Alpha. An Alpha was supposed to be the selfless leader, ruthless protector, and effortless provider. These were qualities she had witnessed and felt. He had accepted her as she was, flaws and all. They were not blood and yet he treated her as if she was family. The woman was deeply indebted to him, wanting to do nothing more than to ensure he made the correct decision to allow him into his fold. To know he died, at the hands of Frost, revived her fear of the Were-Horse. If Tetradore, undefeated in the ring, could die by Frost and his power, then what hope did she have left? It wasn't just the lost of a protector or an Alpha that tore her world apart. Rather it was the loss of a trusted friend that really shook her to her core. She wouldn't say they were close as best friends, nothing like the relationship between Tetradore and Tobias. However, they were close, at least close enough to watch out for the other. He helped her when she needed help and in return she did whatever she needed to do for him, whether it was something helpful or simply falling in line as a good member in his pack. Trust was a very fragile thing for her, and she trusted him completely. If she could do whatever it took to bring him back, she would, no matter the cost. Long ago she made a promise to herself that should anything happen to them, and in a scenario only one could survive, she would do everything she could to ensure he made out alive, safe and sound. Without Tetradore the world had grown darker, colder, and whatever sliver of hope there was within her it was snuffed out.

Raven desperately needed the sleep before the Ark opened for its nightly event. As always she prepared the meals for the day, hardly wishing to rely or exhaust the staff with Tobias' demand of food. She cooked the pack, and Alexis, breakfast, lunch, and dinner, while handling the on goings of the Ark business and the other business on the side. (Raven had no idea about Tetradore's other businesses he left in the dark.) Alone, she handled all the work, met those that were in charge, and made the deals that were necessary, all the while being in charge while Tetradore was no longer with them. Jackal had adamantly insisted she not change any of the names out of Tetradore, claiming that it was an order from their deceased Alpha. Even in death Raven would not want to disobey, so she ensured everything continued to run as smoothly. With Nadya no longer around, Regan coming and going, she would pick take on the role to survey and check on their pack's territory. Hardly did the girl have any time to herself, because whatever time she did have left would be spent with her mate. The poor girl was fast asleep within the hammock she shared with her mate, her book half open against her chest. It was the sound of her mate's excitement that woke her up. She had no idea who he meant by 'he is home now.' The girl was wondering if Jackal left to do something and was coming back with a promised treat for her mate. Yawning, she stretched for a moment, setting the book back into the hammock while shuffling outside their room and entering the hallway.

Quietly she headed towards where Tobias was sitting, with someone sitting within...his throne. Concerned she quickened her steps and as she got closer a surprised audible gasp could be heard, as her hands quickly went to her face. If it wasn't for Serafina then Raven would not believe in ghosts. Yet sitting in the throne was a figure she hardly thought she would ever see again. She could hardly move or make another sound, as she stood there watching the dark-haired man sit there as her mate speak to him as if he had been only gone yesterday. A turbulent of emotions were running through and she could barely name them all. There was genuine happiness, and sadness twisted together with anger and curiosity. She wasn't angry with him, never, but she was angry and ashamed at herself for truly not believing. How was it possible that their Alpha could come in, without any evidence of being harmed or killed, sit there as if nothing ever happened? Raven could hardly understand and maybe she ought to not try, but logically it didn't make sense. That severed bond ached even more now as she started at Tetradore not feeling the bond renew or mend itself. The moment he died she felt the overwhelming pain and even with Tobias became Alpha it did not heal. She remembered, she remembered Sam telling them he dismantled into ash. That same ash was picked up and carried off by the winds. He shouldn't be here, he couldn't be here...it just didn't make sense. This had to be a trick. Perhaps this was Frost's doing or someone else, having the ability to look and smell like their fallen Alpha, if only to trick them and take hold. Who could blame Raven for doubting that the man before her was her recently deceased Alpha? If there was a Doubting Thomas then Raven would fulfill that role.

A few tears silently fell as she took a few tentative steps, her head obediently lowering. Her fingers wrapped around the other, her usual nervous tick, troubled, anxious and afraid. She did not believe this was Tetradore and yet she desperately wanted to believe. With all these emotions colliding into her she could hardly manage to make sensible thought. What if this was Tetradore? What if he was angry with her, for not believing it was him? What an awful pack mate she would be. Yet at the same time what if this wasn't Tetradore and it was indeed a vile hoax? How could she know? Tobias acted as if this was indeed their beloved fallen Alpha, acting as if he was merely gone for one night. Blue-grey eyes traced over her Alpha, taking note of anything that was out of character or anything that seemed out of place. He looked like their Alpha, he smelled like their Alpha, and yet that bond between Alpha and follower was not whole, it was not patched. Afraid of the consequences should she be right or wrong, she took a deep breath, trying to keep herself in control. A soft mournful voice cracked, as she barely spoke, too afraid of what would happen, afraid of not only disappointing him and bring more shame to herself, but for disappointing her mate as well.

" I..We..we've all missed you. I'm sorry Tetra, truly I am for asking, but...it isn't possible for one to come back from the dead. How do we know this isn't some cruel trick...how do we know you are really you? I..I just don't understand. Sam said you burst into ash...you were dead. The bond was severed, we felt it that night. The pain in that bond went numb as the months went by, and you are here, and yet I still don't feel it, I don't feel that bond."

She wanted that bond back, desperately she wanted to feel that bond so that she knew she was reunited with her Alpha. He was family to her, and it pained her that she still couldn't not feel, which helped lead her to wonder if he was truly he. Worriedly her eyes lifted upwards to see his own eyes, the girl desperately searching for an answer. Maybe this was Tetradore, and if so, she hoped he wouldn't be angry with her and see the disappointment in his emerald eyes. And if it wasn't Tetradore...then what would she do? Silently she prayed she was wrong, wondering if miracles do indeed exist.

Raven Clocksworth.